1/03/2019

Hello, It's Me


Hello, Internet. It's me again. 

Thank you so much for taking the time to stop by and read my ramblings and muddling through the realness with me. Thank you also for those of you who reached out to me after my last post. I have been thinking a lot about the internet, and while there are some days I want to be a sheep herder in Iceland and leave this world behind, it is in these moments I am so thankful for the connection, the support. 

You know what time of year it is. It's the beginning. Page 3 / 365. Do you have your resolutions all mapped out to the T? Your gym memberships bought? Your diets planned? Your motivational podcasts qued? And what about those trash bags to de-clutter ... you got those babies ready to go? 

Stressed? Don't be. I have done none of this and honestly I don't plan on it. You see I'm trying something different this year ... mostly because I am in a situation that I had never have been before. To spare you the details I am not at my healthiest point in my life ... these past few months I have known more illness and more injury than I ever have in my twenty years here. I am in the process of learning to live in my body as a baby && winter break has been met with a lot of time off and lots of introspection about how I foresee this next year of my life panning out. It's going to be quite different: no huge adventures abroad have been planned yet and no transitions are happening until 2020. This year is going to be the year of work: both academically and on cultivating the person that I want to be as I graduate and head out into the world sooner than I know it. 

I have created a list of five points that I wanted to share with you about where I want my mindset to be for this upcoming year. It is a bit ironic since once of my goals for this year is more finely distinguishing the line between my public and my private life and my life online and off ... but you know what they say ... what you put in writing make you accountable && you know I am all about creating community. 

I. Relearn how to be alone
I listened to a very interesting TED talk the other day which inspired me to relook into something my only child self knew how to do when I was younger ... and while I have become more of an extrovert than an introvert nowadays (which is so exciting and so fun) there are qualities I want to re-cultivate to be a more mindful, focused human being. 

II. Write. Every. Day
Ever since I can remember my teachers and professors have told me I possess a skill for writing. Truth be told ... I hate it. The physical act of forcing myself to sit down and bang out some words on a screen or notebook does not appeal to me at all; however, once I am done there is a space that I long to prolong in my head -- the space of clarity through processing the internal world externally. I have made myself a promise to write everyday so that this flame of creativity stays lit, so that I can explore the world through my thoughts. 

III. Declutter my newsfeed and only view what will make me a better person.
I have been thinking a lot lately about how I interact with social content. The way in which I have used social media since first downloading Instagram June 2012 has changed immensely: It has become mindless and I have started using the internet as a tool to pass time and to escape the feeling of boredom that I have once known so well that I am now a stranger to. I have been unfollowing a lot of people and  brands and cleared out my feeds to people who I no longer know, wish to know or who no longer serve me in becoming the person that I want to be. It is liberating. In doing this I am looking to reshape how I use the internet and use it as a tool ... not a crutch.  

IV. Make real change and become part of the real world
Intentionally vague? Absolutely. Most of my life has been dedicated to learning and enriching myself with the goal of one day bringing this carefully curated version of my being to contribute to the world. I am at a point now where I am ready to bring my person I have become and implement her into society through active, real and life changing service to humanity. 

V. Read a book a month
Pretty self explanatory here. I read a LOT for school ... mostly things that I do not choose / are very dry. I have chosen some books to read these next few months that are ones to challenge the way I have been thinking to provide myself with tools to be a more innovative, inclusive and deductive thinker and leader. 

Here is to a year of cultivating an intellectual
discovering the best version of myself
balancing emotions and practicality
taking things as they come

all to become the most empowered version of myself to share with the world and fight for what I believe in, never surrendering and never backing down

cheers to a year of hope!

xx
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